The art & science of standing out in crowded marketplaces
TL;DR
The average person sees more than 5,000 ads daily, and the "shout louder" approach to marketing is creating diminishing returns. This post explores why consistency beats frequency, how resonance works at a neurological level, and five tactical ways to create deeper connection with your audience without burning yourself out. Spoiler: being everywhere isn't the answer—being aligned is.
Key Takeaway: Standing out doesn't require being louder. It requires being more aligned. And that shift makes marketing sustainable, joyful, and actually effective.
Quick Links
- Podcast with Paige: https://joyfirstworld.com/blogs/joy-first-podcast/paige-brunton-focus
- Thai Insurance Ad: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uaWA2GbcnJU
- Tara Lynn & Co. taralynnandco.com / | Fb post
- The Antarctic Experience: antarcticexperience.com
- Trader Joes Newsletter: traderjoes.com/home/ff
- Glorious Gravel: https://gloriousgravel.com/
Ready to stop shouting and start resonating?
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Introduction: The Noise Problem
Hey everyone, welcome back to The Joy First Podcast. I'm Nic, and today we're talking about something that I think is going to feel like a massive exhale for a lot of you.
Because here's the thing... the average person sees over 5,000 ads every single day. Five THOUSAND .
And if you're a business owner, you're not just on the receiving end of that noise... you're also being told you need to ADD to it.
The Expectation:
- Post daily on Instagram
- Show up on TikTok
- Be on LinkedIn
- Don't forget Facebook
- Oh and Pinterest
- And Threads now apparently?
- And you should probably have a YouTube channel
- And a podcast
- And be sending emails (daily emails, maybe twice daily if you really want to grow)
It's exhausting just saying it out loud.
And look, I get it. I really do. When everyone's shouting, it feels like you need to shout louder just to be heard. It's like being at a concert where everyone's talking and you have to yell just to have a conversation with the person standing right next to you.
But here's what I want to talk about today...
What if the answer isn't shouting louder?
What if the answer is resonating deeper?
A Story About Resonance
I'm going to share a quick story that made this click for me.
A few years ago, I was scrolling through Instagram (as one does when avoiding actual work), and I came across this tiny ceramics brand. They posted maybe twice a week. Their feed wasn't perfectly curated. They didn't have a massive following.
But something about their work just... stopped me.
What Made Them Different:
- The way they talked about their process
- The imperfections they celebrated in their pieces
- The fact that every single caption felt like a real person was writing it, not a content calendar robot
What Happened Next:
- I saved three of their posts
- I visited their website
- I bought two mugs (that I still use every single day, by the way)
- I've recommended them to probably a dozen people since
They didn't interrupt me with ads. They didn't post 47 times a day. They didn't follow every "growth hack" in the book.
They just resonated with me. Deeply.
And THAT'S what we're unpacking today. The difference between reach and resonance. Between shouting louder and connecting deeper.
Because I truly believe this is the future of marketing. Not just because it works better (though it does)... but because it feels better. For you, the person creating the marketing. And for the people receiving it.
The Attention Economy's Fatal Flaw
So let's start with the problem.
Traditional marketing is built on interruption and volume. It's built on the idea that if you can just get in front of enough people, enough times, eventually someone will buy.
And look, that DID work. For a long time, it worked.
But here's what's happening now...
We've hit this point of attention fatigue where people are so bombarded with messages that they've developed what researchers call "ad blindness."
Your brain literally learns to tune it out. It's a survival mechanism.
Think about it:
- When was the last time you actually READ a banner ad on a website?
- When was the last time you didn't immediately skip a pre-roll ad on YouTube?
- When was the last time you opened a promotional email from a brand you don't already love?
We've gotten so good at filtering out noise that most marketing just... disappears into the void.
The Diminishing Returns Problem
And here's the really brutal part... the "shout louder" approach creates diminishing returns.
- The more you post, the less each post matters
- The more ads you run, the more expensive they get and the less effective they become
- The more emails you send, the more people unsubscribe or just stop opening them altogether
The Dating Analogy
It's like... okay, stay with me.
You know how when you first start dating someone and they text you, you get that little dopamine hit? You're excited to hear from them?
But then imagine if they started texting you every hour. Every half hour. Just constant messages about what they're eating, what they're thinking, random observations about the weather...
At first you might think "oh, they're just really into me."
But pretty quickly it becomes overwhelming. Annoying even. And you start dreading seeing their name pop up on your phone.
That's what constant posting does to your audience.
The Burnout Problem
And here's the part that really gets me... this approach doesn't just stop working for your audience. It burns YOU out.
Because you're on this hamster wheel of constant content creation. You're trying to be everywhere, all the time. You're performing this version of consistency that's actually just... everywhere-ness.
And it's not sustainable.
I see so many brilliant business owners:
- Go HARD on social media for a month (posting every day, showing up in stories, doing all the things)
- Disappear for six months because they're completely fried
- Feel guilty about disappearing
- Try to come back with big energy
- Repeat the cycle
That's not marketing. That's self-inflicted chaos.
So if that's not the answer... what is?
The Science of Resonance
Okay, let's talk about what resonance actually means.
In Physics:
Resonance happens when one object vibrating at a certain frequency causes another object to vibrate at that same frequency.
Example: Think about a wine glass shattering when someone hits exactly the right note. That's resonance.
In Psychology and Marketing:
Resonance is when your message connects so deeply with someone that it creates this kind of... emotional vibration. They feel it in their body. It bypasses their rational defenses and goes straight to the part of them that just KNOWS.
The Neuroscience:
And here's what's really fascinating from a neurological perspective...
When content resonates with us, our brains process it completely differently than when we're just being interrupted by ads.
Interruption Marketing:
- Activates our prefrontal cortex (the analytical part of our brain)
- The part that's like "is this relevant to me? Should I care? What are they trying to sell me?"
Resonant Content:
- Activates our limbic system (the emotional center)
- The part that forms deep memories and creates connections
The Memory Formation Difference
That's why you can watch a thousand ads and forget them all, but you can watch ONE ad that truly resonates and remember it years later.
Personal Example:
I still remember this commercial from probably 15 years ago for a Thai life insurance company. It wasn't selling me anything directly. It was just this beautiful story about a man who does small acts of kindness every day, and how those acts ripple outward.
I have never needed to buy life insurance in Thailand. But I remember that ad. I remember how it made me feel. And I remember the brand.
THAT'S the power of resonance.
The Beautiful Part:
Resonance doesn't require volume. It doesn't require being everywhere.
It just requires:
- Being aligned
- Being true
- Being specific about who you are and what you stand for
Five Tactics for Resonating Deeper
Alright, let's get tactical. I'm going to share five specific ways you can create more resonance in your marketing without burning yourself out trying to be everywhere at once.
Tactic #1: Clarity of Purpose - Standing Firmly for Something Specific
The first thing you need to resonate deeply is clarity about what you actually stand for.
Not what you DO. What you stand FOR.
Because here's the thing... people don't just buy products or services. They buy into IDEAS. Beliefs. Movements.
Client Example: Tara
I've got a client, Tara, who went through Super Bloom recently. And when we did her Whyfinding session, we uncovered that at her core, what she's really about is spreading love. Specifically, radical, rebellious love in a world that's increasingly divided.
Now, when she first said it, she almost apologized for it. Like "I know it sounds basic, but..."
But here's what we realized:
Spreading love ISN'T basic when you're doing it intentionally, fiercely, especially toward the most vulnerable.
When everyone else in her industry was leading with fear and scarcity, Tara was leading with love. And that clarity, that willingness to stand for something specific even when it feels "too simple" or "too soft"... that's what makes people stop and pay attention.
In a sea of sameness, taking a clear stand is magnetic.
Tactic #2: Emotional Truth - Connecting Through Authentic Vulnerability
The second way to resonate deeper is through emotional truth.
And I don't mean oversharing. I don't mean trauma-dumping in your Instagram captions.
I mean being willing to share the REAL stuff:
- The behind-the-scenes
- The mistakes
- The "I almost didn't do this" moments
Examples:
Dove's Real Beauty Campaign:
- They didn't just sell soap
- They took a stand against unrealistic beauty standards
- They showed real women, real bodies, real stories
Brené Brown:
- Built an entire empire by researching vulnerability
- Then being vulnerable herself
- Sharing her own struggles with shame and worthiness
That emotional truth creates connection in a way that perfectly polished content never can.
Because when you're real, people feel safe being real back. And that's where loyalty comes from.
Tactic #3: Pattern Interruption - Breaking Expected Norms Thoughtfully
The third tactic is about thoughtful pattern interruption.
This isn't about being weird for the sake of being weird. It's about identifying what everyone ELSE in your industry is doing... and then deliberately doing something different.
Client Example: Lori's Antarctic Travel Brand
I have another client, Lori, who's building an Antarctic travel brand.
What Most Antarctic Travel Brands Do:
- Lead with hardcore adventure
- Emphasize extreme conditions
- Focus on "ticking off your seventh continent"
- Very "look how tough and adventurous we are" energy
What Lori Did Differently:
Lori's background is as an educator and a guide. And her brand personality is Seaside, which means she's naturally calm, contemplative, refined.
So instead of shouting about adventure, her brand leads with:
- The transformative power of Antarctica
- The consciousness shift that happens when you're in that environment
- The spiritual and emotional impact of being in one of the last truly wild places on Earth
The Result:
Her first impression is soothing, luxurious, deeply trustworthy. Not because she's hiding the adventure... but because she's approaching it from a completely different angle than everyone else.
And in a sea of RED PARKA ADVENTURE ENERGY... her calm, conscious approach absolutely stands out.
That's thoughtful pattern interruption.
Tactic #4: Consistency Over Frequency - Being Reliably Present vs. Constantly Present
Okay, this is the one I want to really expand on because I think it's where most people are getting it wrong.
There's this idea floating around that you need to be EVERYWHERE, ALL THE TIME to be successful.
The Expectation:
- Post on Instagram daily
- Show up in stories multiple times a day
- Send emails constantly
- Be on every platform
But here's what I've learned:
Consistency is not the same as frequency.
- Consistency means showing up reliably in a way that your people can count on
- Frequency means showing up constantly whether it's valuable or not
Example: Trader Joe's Fearless Flyer
One of my favorite examples of this is Trader Joe's and their Fearless Flyer. If you've never seen it, it's this little newsletter they send out maybe once a month, sometimes less. It's charming, it's specific, it's genuinely interesting.
Meanwhile:
- Most grocery stores are sending me emails every single day
- Sometimes multiple times a day
- And I delete every single one without opening them
But when I get the Fearless Flyer? I actually read it. Because it's not noise. It's signal.
The Burnout Prevention Part
And here's the part that ties into burnout prevention...
When you focus on consistency over frequency, you can actually SUSTAIN your marketing long-term.
Think about it like marathon training versus sprint training.
Sprint Training:
- If you sprint at full speed, you can keep that up for maybe 100 meters before you're completely gassed
Marathon Training:
- But if you find a sustainable pace? You can run for MILES
That's what consistency over frequency gives you. It's marathon mode for your marketing.
What This Looks Like:
You're not burning yourself out trying to post three times a day on five different platforms.
You're showing up reliably, in the places that actually matter to your people, with content that actually resonates.
And you can do THAT for years. Decades even.
The Common Pattern I See:
I see so many business owners treat marketing like a sprint:
- They go HARD for a month
- Post every day, show up everywhere, do all the things
- Then they crash
- They disappear for six months because they're completely fried
- Then they feel guilty
- So they try to come back with big energy
- And the cycle repeats
That's not sustainable. And it's definitely not joyful.
The Shift:
But when you shift to consistency over frequency... when you give yourself permission to show up reliably without being everywhere...
It changes everything.
You're not performing productivity anymore. You're just showing up as yourself, regularly, in a way that you can maintain.
And honestly? That feels SO much better.
Not just for you, but for your audience too. Because they're not getting bombarded. They're getting thoughtful, resonant content when you have something worth saying.
That's the shift.
Tactic #5: Precision Targeting - Finding Your Exact Right People
And the fifth tactic is precision targeting.
This is about getting crystal clear on who you're ACTUALLY for, and letting everyone else go.
I know, I know. That sounds scary. Especially when you're building a business and you feel like you need ALL the clients.
But here's the truth: When you try to be for everyone, you resonate with no one.
Example: Glorious Gravel Cycling
I'm going to use my husband's business as an example here. He runs a cycling brand in the UK called Glorious Gravel.
The Cycling Industry Standard:
- Dominated by elitist, competitive, lycra-clad racing energy
- Often feels like an exclusive boys' club
What Glorious Gravel Does Differently:
From the very beginning, they centered two specific ideas: togetherness and inclusivity.
Their Track Record:
- Kids as young as six have completed their rides
- Riders as old as 86 have completed their rides
- Men and women
- Super fit people and first-timers
What They Sell:
What they sell isn't "be the fastest" or "be the coolest."
It's "have a great day out on the bike, in nature, with a celebratory cold drink and hot food together at the end."
The Result:
And because they're SO specific about who they're for and what they stand for... they've become the most popular gravel cycling brand in the UK.
Not through trying to appeal to everyone. Through precision.
They know EXACTLY who they're for. And those people feel SEEN in a way that makes them become raving fans who refer everyone they know.
That's the power of precision targeting.
Quick Resonance Audit
Okay, so we've covered five tactics for resonating deeper. But how do you know if you're actually doing this... or if you're still stuck in "shouting louder" mode?
I want to give you a quick audit you can do on your own marketing.
Question 1: Intention vs. Obligation
When you post content, are you posting because you have something worth saying, or because it's "time to post"?
- If you're posting just to fill a content calendar, that's not resonance. That's noise.
- Resonant content comes from having something you actually want to share. An insight. A story. A perspective that matters.
Question 2: Engagement Quality
When people engage with your content, are they taking action or just liking?
- Resonance creates action: It makes people comment with thoughtful responses. It makes them save your posts to come back to. It makes them share it with someone else.
- Noise gets likes. Resonance gets engagement.
Question 3: Clarity of Purpose
Can you articulate what you stand FOR in one clear sentence?
If you can't... that's where you need to start. Because without clarity of purpose, everything you do will feel scattered.
And scattered content doesn't resonate. It just adds to the noise.
Question 4: Sustainability
Are you showing up in a way you can sustain for the next five years?
This is the burnout question.
- If your current marketing approach requires you to sprint at full speed constantly... it's not sustainable.
- And if it's not sustainable, it's not going to work long-term.
Resonant marketing is marathon marketing. It's built to last.
Question 5: Energy Check
Do you feel GOOD about your marketing?
This might sound fluffy, but it matters.
- If creating your marketing feels like a chore, like something you have to force yourself to do... that energy comes through.
- But if you feel good about what you're creating, if it feels aligned and true... people feel that too.
And that feeling? That's what creates resonance.
Closing Thoughts
Alright, let's bring this home.
The Big Idea:
Standing out doesn't require being louder. It requires being more aligned.
And honestly? That's really good news.
Because:
- Being loud is exhausting
- Being everywhere is exhausting
- Trying to keep up with every trend and platform and algorithm change is exhausting
But being aligned? Being clear about who you are and what you stand for? Showing up consistently in a way that feels good to YOU?
That's sustainable. That's joyful. And that's what actually works.
Your Action Step:
I want you to take some time this week to audit your recent marketing. Look at the last five things you posted or sent. Ask yourself:
- Did this resonate, or did it just reach?
- Did I post this because I had something worth saying, or because I "should"?
- Does this feel aligned with who I am and what I stand for?
And if the answer makes you uncomfortable... that's actually good information. Because now you know where to shift.
Join Founders' Circle
And if you want support in making this shift, if you want to be around other business owners who are building their businesses this way... getting into the habit of marketing that actually feels good and works long-term... I'd love to have you in Founders' Circle.
What You Get:
It's our community where we work on this stuff together:
- Weekly co-working sessions
- Monthly Q&A calls with me
- Monthly copy editing
- Monthly design hotseats
It's basically the support system I wish I'd had 20 years ago when I was trying to figure this all out on my own.
Coming Up:
And we've got our 2026 Goal Setting Session coming up on December 18th. If you join before then, you'll be part of that session where we map out your joy-first, resonance-based marketing strategy for the entire year.
Learn more: https://go.joyfirstworld.com/jffc
Final Reminder:
But whether you join us or not, I want you to remember this:
You don't have to shout louder. You just have to resonate deeper.
And when you do that? Everything changes.
